THE LATE MATTIA PASCAL - 1904
Chapter 18
THE LATE MATTIA PASCAL
In my impatience and my rage--I know
not which was greater--I ceased to
care whether anybody recognized me
or not before or after I got there.
I took just one precaution: a seat
in the first class. For that matter,
it was dark, and my experience with
Berto reassured me: convinced as
everybody was of my fateful death
two years before, no one would ever
dream of taking me for Mattia
Pascal. I leaned out of the
car-window, hoping that the siglf of
familiar scenes would divert my
thoughts to less violent emotions;
but this served only to intensify
both my anger and my impatience. In
the moonlight I made out the hills
back of "The Coops."
"The wretches!" I hissed. "Over
there.... But now!..."
In my surprise at the unexpected
news from home, I had forgotten to
ask Eoberto ever so many things.
The farm and the mill! Had they been
sold? Or were they still in the
hands of a receiver? How about Batty
Malagna? And Aunt Scolastica?
Was all that only two years and a
half--thirty months--before? It felt
more like a century! So many things
had befallen me, it seemed life at
Miragno must have been just as
exciting. And yet, nothing much had
happened, probably, except Romilda's
marriage to Pomino, commonplace
enough in itself, though now my
sudden return from the dead might
make it appear unusual! Where would
I go, when I got there?
And where were they living?
Certainly not where I used to live.
My humble habitation as a
two-lire-a-day man would never do
for Pomino, rich as the only son of
a wealthy sire. Besides, Pomino, who
was a sensitive fellow, would not
have felt quite at home among so
many reminders of me. Doubtless he
had gone to live with his father in
the _palazzo_! And imagine the widow
Pescatore in those surroundings!
What airs she would put on! And that
poor old devil, Gerolamo Pomino
First--so timid, so gentle, so
retiring! Bet he's having the time
of his life in the claws of that old
harpy! A real run for his money! For
neither the old man nor his gosling
of a son would ever have the courage
to kick her out! And now... the
goat as usual! I take her off their
hands!
Yes, there's where I would go, to
the Pomino mansion; and even if they
weren't there, I'd find out from the
janitress or somebody...
Oh, my quiet sleepy old home sweet
home! What a shock you'll get
tomorrow when you hear I'm alive
again!
There was a bright moon that evening;
and all the public lights were off
as usual. The streets were quite
deserted, since at that hour almost
everybody was 'at supper.
In my great excitement I was hardly
aware that I had legs at all. I
walked as on thin air, my feet
scarcely touching the ground. I
cannot
describe the emotions I felt. They
reduced to something like a great
Homeric laughter, shaking
spasmodically about my diaphragm,
unable to find a way out. I am sure
that had I turned it loose, it would
have blown the houses over from the
force of its explosion.
I was at the Pomino place in no time;
but to my surprise I found no one on
hand in the sort of dog kennel on
the driveway where the old janitress
used to live.
I knocked.
For some moments no answer came. In
the meantime my eye had a chance to
fall on a piece of mourning crepe,
now bleached and dusty, which seemed
to have hung exposed to the weather
there for several months. Who had
died? The widow Pescatore? Cavalier
Pomino? One of the two undoubtedly!
More likely the old man! In which
case, I would find my two doves
cooing up on the first floor in the
grand suite--already settled in the
"palace." I was too impatient to
wait. I opened the front door and
ran up the stairs, three steps at a
time.
On the first landing I met the
janitress coming down.
"Cavaliere Pomino?" I asked.
>From the astonishment with which
the old mud-turtle looked at me, I
understood that the District
Inspector of Education must have
been dead a good long time.
"Young Mr. Pomino--Gerolamino!" I
corrected, resuming my ascent.
I couldn't quite understand what the
old woman was muttering to herself;
I know simply that at the top of the
stairs I had to halt to catch my
breath. The door to the Pomino
apartment was in front of me.
"They may be still at dinner!" I
reflected philosophically, though in
a flash. "All three eating, without
the least suspicion! In a few
seconds, I will have knocked on this
door and their lives will be
topsy-turvy! ... Look! Here in my
hand rests the fate in store for
them!"
I took the bell rope in my hand; and
as I pulled it, I listened, my heart
leaping with excitement. The house
was absolutely still. In the silence
I could barely hear the distant
tinkle of the bell.
All the blood rushed to my head and
my ears began to ring, as though
that faint tinkling which had been
swallowed up in the silence were
clanging furiously inside my brain.
In a few seconds, I started
violently. On the other side of the
door I heard a voice, the voice of
the widow Pescatore:
"Who's calling?"
I could not, for an instant, utter a
sound. I pressed my fists to my
chest to keep my heart from breaking
through. Then with a husky hollow
voice I answered, syllable by
syllable:
"Mat-tia-Pas-cal!"
"Who?" called the voice within.
"Mattia Pascal!" I answered,
deepening my voice still further.
Certainly the old witch was scared
out of her wits: for I heard her
patter off down the hall, as though
the Devil were after her.
I could imagine what was taking
place in the dining-room. The man
in the house would be sent out,
Pomino, the courageous!
However, I had to ring
again--gently, gently, as before.
Pomino threw the door wide open, and
there I stood, erect, my
shoulders back, my chest thrown
forward.
He recoiled in terror. I strode upon
him with a cry:
"Mattia Pascal! From the other
world!"
Pomino collapsed on the floor, and
sat there, his weight resting on his
hands, his eyes staring with fright
and bewilderment:
"Mattia! Y-y-you?"
The widow Pescatore came running out
with a lamp in her hand. At sight of
me she gave one long piercing
scream. I slammed the door to with a
kick, and caught the lamp before it
could fall from her hands.
"Shut up!" I hissed into her face.
"Do you really take me for a ghost?"
"Alive!" she gasped, pale as death,
her hands clutching wildly at her
hair.
"Alive! Alive as they make 'em!" I
answered with ferocious joy. "You
swore I was dead though, didn't you!
Drowned--out there!..."
"Where did you come from? she asked
in absolute terror.
"From the Flume, you witch!" I
replied between my teeth. "Here's
the lamp, up close! Look at me! Who
am I? Do you recognize me? Or do you
still think I'm the man they found
in the Flume?"
"It wasn't you?"
"Bad 'cess to you, she-goat! Here I
am, alive! And you, Mino, what are
you sprawling there for? Get up!
Where's Romilda?"
"Oh, oh, oh!" groaned Pomino,
jumping to his feet. "The baby!...
I'm afraid.... She's nursing!..."
"What baby?" said I.
"Our little girl!"
"Oh, the murderer! The murderer!"
shrieked the Pescatore woman.
I was unable to answer, the effect
of this latest piece of news was
still so strong upon me.
"Your little girl? A baby, to boot?
Well now that, my dear sir..."
"Mamma, go in to Romilda, please!"
begged Pomino.
But it was too late. Romilda was
already out in the hallway, her
dressing gown unbuttoned at the top,
her baby nursing, her hair awry, as
though she had hurriedly risen from
a bed. The moment she saw me she
cried:
"Mattia!"
And she fell fainting into the arms
of her husband and her mother.
They dragged her away--considerately
leaving me standing there with their
baby in my arms! For I had run to
the rescue also.
With the lamp now gone, the hallway
was almost pitch dark. But there I
stood holding that frail
acrid-smelling bundle from which a
tiny little voice came, blubbering
through unswallowed milk. Alarmed,
bewildered, not knowing what to do
next, I was clearly conscious only
of the shriek from the woman who had
once been mine, and who
now--precisely, ladies and
gentlemen--was mother to this child
who was not mine, who was not
mine--Mine? Ah mine, she had hated
in its poor little time! Mine she
had never loved! So I now--no, no, a
thousand times no, I would have no
pity on this intruder, nor on them
either! She had looked out for
herself, all right! She had married
again: while I... I...
But the faint whimper kept coming
from the bundle on my arms... What
could I do to stop it? "Hush, little
one! Hush, little one! 'At's a
daisy! 'At's a daisy!" And I began
patting the infant on her tiny back,
and tossing her gently to and fro.
The bleating grew fainter and
fainter and at last was still.
Pomino's voice rang through the
hallway:
"Mattia! The baby!"
"Sh-h-h-h, you donkey! Don't wake
her up again!"
"What are you doing with her?"
"Eating her raw! What do you suppose
I'm doing with her? They chucked her
at me. Now I've got her quiet. God
sake, don't wake her up on me now!
Where's Romilda?"
Slinking up to me, suspicious and
fearful, like a dog watching its
puppy in the hands of its master,
Pomino answered:
"Romilda? Why?"
"Because I want to have a word with
her!" I replied gruffly.
"She's fainted, you know!"
"Fainted? Nonsense! We'll bring her
to!"
Pomino cringed in front of me,
blocking my path:
"Oh please, Mattia! Listen... I'm
afraid... How in the world!... You,
here, alive! Where have you been,
where have you been! Oh!... Listen:
couldn't you talk with me instead?"
"No!" I thundered. "My business is
with her. Who are you, anyway? You
don't count around here!"
"What do you mean, I don't count!"
"Very simple! Your marriage is null
and void on the return of the first
spouse!"
"Void? And how's that? And the
baby?"
"The baby! The baby!" I muttered
fiercely. "In less than two years
after my death--married and with a
baby! Shame on you! Hush, little
one! Hush, little one! 'At's a
daisy! Mama's coming soon! Here,
show me the way, you! Is this the
room?"
The moment my nose crossed the
threshold of the bedroom, the widow
Pescatore advanced upon me like a
ravenous hyena. I had the baby on my
left arm. With my right, I gave the
old woman a solid push.
"You just mind your business! Here's
your son-in-law here! If you've any
fuss to make, make it with him! I
don't know you!"
Romilda was weeping piteously. I
bent over her, holding out the baby:
"Here, Romilda, you take her! Tears?
Why do you feel so bad? Because I am
alive? You wanted me dead, didn't
you! Well, look at me! Look! Alive
or dead?"
She tried to raise her eyes through
her tears; and her voice breaking
with sobs, she murmured:
"Oh, Mattia! How is this? You!
What... what have you been doing?"
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"What have I been doing?" I
snickered. "You ask me what I have
been doing! It's clear what you've
been doing! You've married
again--that ninny there! And you've
had a baby! And now, 'Oh, Mattia,
what have you been doing?'"
"Well?" groaned Pomino, his face in
his hands.
"But you, you, you! Where have you
been? You ran away! You played dead!
You deserted your wife! You..." It
was the widow Pescatore, coming at
me again with her arms raised.
I seized one of her wrists, and
twisted it over till she was in my
power:
"Listen, old lady!" I then lectured.
"You just keep out of this; for if I
hear another word from you, I swear
I'll lose all pity for this dunce of
a son-in-law of yours, and for that
little baby there, and I'll... I'll
invoke the law! The law, understand?
You know what the law says? This
marriage is null and void on the
return of the first spouse! I've got
to take Romilda back to me!..."
"My daughter... back to you? You're
crazy!" the old woman cried in
terror.
But Pomino was reduced to zero:
"Mother dear! Mother dear!" he
begged. "Please be quiet, please be
quiet, for the love of God!"
And she let loose on him--fool,
imbecile, milk-sop, ninny,
coward--good for nothing but just to
stand there bleating like a sheep!
I could hardly hold my sides from
laughing.
"Dry up, now!" I commanded, as soon
as I could catch my breath. "He can
have her! He can have her! I wouldn't
be crazy enough to take on a
mother-in-law like you again! Poor,
poor Pomino! Mino, old boy! Forgive
me if I called you an ass! But, as
you hear, your mother-in-law agrees
with me, and I can assure you
Romilda--our wife--! thought the
same of you in the old days. Yes,
she used the very same words for
you--fool, donkey, dunce, and I
forget what else! Didn't you,
Romilda! Tell the truth! Oh now,
dearie me! Don't cry any more! Come,
come, smile for us, won't you? It's
bad for the baby, you know! I'm
alive, that's all, you see. And I
feel like being gay! 'Cheer up!' as
a drunken man said to me one night!
Cheer up, Pomino! Do you think I'd
really have the heart to leave your
baby without a mamma? Not on your
life! I already have a son without a
papa. Ever think of it, Romilda?
We're quits! I have a son, who is
the son of Malagna; and you a
daughter, who is the daughter of
Pomino. Four square! One of these
days we'll make them man and wife!
Anyhow, you'll not feel so bad over
that boy now.... So let's change the
subject!... How did you and your
mother ever come to see me in that
poor devil they found in the
Flume?..."
"Oh, I did too, you know!" said
Pomino, with a touch of anger. "And
so did everybody else! Not just
Romilda and her mother!"
"You had good eyes, I must say! Was
he really so much like me as all
that?"
"Your build! Your hair and whiskers!
Your clothes--black... and
besides, you had been gone so
long!"...
"Deserting house and home, eh? As
though they hadn't driven me to
it... the old lady there! Ah, that
woman! And yet, I was coming back,
you know! Loaded with money! And
then, as nice as you please--dead,
drowned, in an advanced state of
decomposition! Best of
all--identified! Thank heaven for
one thing: I've been having one good
time these two years! While you
people here--engagement, wedding,
honeymoon, house and housekeeping,
baby.... The dead are dead, eh? Long
life to the living!"
"And now?" groaned Pomino, on pins
and needles. "What about it now?
That's what's bothering me."
Romilda got up to put the baby into
its cradle.
"Suppose we step into the other
room," I suggested. "The little
girl's asleep again. Better not wake
her up! We can talk in there!"
On the table in the dining-room the
supper dishes were still lying
about. Trembling, wide-eyed, deathly
pale, winking two cadaverous eyelids
over two white glassy balls pierced
in the middle by two small round
black dots, Pomino sat in a chair
rubbing his forehead, and mumbling
as in a dream:
"Alive!... Alive!... How can we fix
it? What's to become of us?"
"Oh, why worry about that?" I
shouted impatiently. "We'll come to
that in due season, I tell you!"
Romilda made herself presentable and
eventually came to join us. I sat
looking at her under the bright lamp
light. As beautiful as she had ever
been, I thought ... even more
bewitching than when I first met
her!
"Let me have a look at you!" I said.
"You don't mind, do you, Mino?
What's the harm? She's my wife, too,
you know--perhaps more mine, than
yours! Oh, I didn't mean to make
you blush, Romilda! See Mino
squirming? But I'm not going to bite
him! I'm not a ghost!"
"This is intolerable!" said Mino,
livid with anger.
"He's getting nervous," I said,
winking at Romilda. "Come now,
Mino, old man, don't worry! I'm not
going to cut you out again! And this
time I'll keep my promise!
Except--if you don't mind--just
one...!"
I went over to Romilda and smacked a
loud kiss off her cheek.
"Mattia!" shrieked Pomino
desperately.
Again I laughed aloud.
"Jealous, eh?" I said. "And of me!
Now that's hardly fair! There's
something coming to me on grounds of
prior right, if for nothing else.
Anyhow, Romilda, just forget it all,
forget it all.... You see, in coming
here... forgive me, won't you,
Romilda ... in coming here, I
supposed, my dear Mino, that you
would be glad to have me take her
off your hands. ... And the thought
of doing so was not at all to my
liking, I can tell you... for I
wanted to get even with you... and I
would like to still... but this time
by stealing Romilda away from you...
because I see you are in love with
her and she... well, yes ... she's a
dream, a dream... the way she was
years ago when we first... you
haven't forgotten, eh, Romilda? ...
Oh, poor girl! I didn't intend to
make you cry.... But they were good
days, those old ones, eh... gone
forever now?... But never mind! You
have a little girl of your own...
and let's forget all about such
things. Of course, I'm not going to
trouble you... what do you take me
for?..."
"But this marriage... it's null and
void?" cried Pomino.
"What do you care?" I answered.
"That may be the law of it. But
who's going to invoke the law? I'm
not! I won't even bother to cancel
my death certificate, unless I'm
forced to by money matters. I'm
satisfied if people have a look at
me, know I'm alive and well, and see
that I'm through with this playing
dead--a death, which was a real one,
I assure you. You were married
publicly.... For a year or more you
have been living publicly as man and
wife. Such you will continue to be!
Who's going to ask any questions
about the legal status of Romilda's
first marriage? That water has gone
under the bridge. Romilda was my
wife; now she's yours, and mother of
a child of yours! A few days' gossip
and everybody will drop the
subject. Am I not right, you
miserable twice-over mother-in-law?"
The Pescatore woman, frowning,
ferocious, nodded in the
affirmative. But Pomino, more and
more nervous, asked:
"But you're going to settle here at
Miragno?"
"Of course! And I'll come once in a
while to get a cup of coffee or sip
a glass of wine to your health!"
"That you won't!" snarled the widow,
jumping to her feet.
"But he's joking! Can't you see?"
said Romilda, keeping her eyes away
from mine.
I laughed aloud as I had before.
"You see, Romilda!" I jested,
"they're afraid we'll begin making
love again.... And it would serve
them right.... However... let's not
be too hard on poor Mino.... Since
he doesn't care to have me in the
house, I'll just walk up and down in
the street, under your windows....
What do you say? A serenade, not too
often, of course..."
Pomino was now stamping up and down
the room in a veritable frenzy:
"Intolerable!" he cried. "This won't
do! This won't do!"
All at once he stopped and said:
"You can't get away from the fact
that... with you here... alive...
she won't ever be my wife!..."
"Just you pretend I'm dead!" I
answered quietly.
He began stamping up and down again:
"I can pretend no such thing!"
"Well, don't then! But do you think
I'm going to disturb you--unless
Romilda asks me to? After all, she's
the one to decide.... Say, Romilda,
speak up now! Which is the better
looking, he or I?"
"I am thinking of the law!" said
Pomino almost in a scream.
Romilda looked at him anxiously.
"Well," I remarked. "As matters
stand, it seems I'm the one who has
more right to find fault than
anybody. I've got to see my
beautiful, my charming, my _quondam_
better half and helpmeet living with
you as your wife!"
"But Romilda--" exclaimed Pomino,
"she isn't really my wife any
longer!"
"Bosh!" I replied. "I came here to
get even, and I let you off. I give
you my wife! I guarantee not to
annoy you.... And still you are not
satisfied! Come, Romilda, get on
your things. Let's be going... the
two of us... on a honeymoon! We'll
have a great time.... Why bother
with this thing here?... He's not a
man, he's a law-book. Why, he's
asking me really to go and drown
myself in the Flume!"
"No, I'm not asking that!" cried
Pomino in utter exasperation. "But
go away, at least! Leave town, live
somewhere else, far away! And for
heaven sake, don't let anybody see
you! Because, I, here, with you
alive..."
I rose and laid my hand gently on
his shoulder to quiet him a little.
I told him that I had already called
on my brother at Oneglia, that
everyone probably by this time knew,
or that certainly by the next
morning would know, that I had come
to life again. Then I added:
"But you ask me to drop out of sight
again, and live far away from
here--play dead again in short! You
must be joking, my dear boy! Come,
brace up--yon play husband the best
way you can, and stop worrying. Your
marriage, come what may, is a solemn
fact. Everybody will stand by you,
especially since there's a little
one involved. As for me, I promise,
I swear, never to come near you,
even for a puny little cup of
coffee, even for the sweet, the
exalting, the exhilarating spectacle
of your blissful union, your devoted
passion, your exemplary concord--all
built up on my considerateness in
dying! Ungrateful wretches! I'll
wager not a one of you, not even
you, Pomino--bosom friend of my
boyhood--ever took the trouble to
place a wreath, a bunch of flowers,
on my grave there in the
cemetery!... A good guess, eh? Tell
the truth: did you?"
"You are having a good time with us,
aren't you!" exclaimed Pomino,
shrugging his shoulders.
"A good time? Nothing of the kind!
I'm in deadly earnest. It's a
question of a soul in Purgatory--no
room for joking. Tell me! Did you?"
"No-o-o, I didn't.... I didn't have
the courage to," Pomino murmured.
"But courage enough to run off with
my wife behind my back, eh, you
rascal?"
"Well, how about yourself?" Mino
retorted with some spirit. "You took
her away from me, didn't you, in the
first place, when you were alive!"
"I?" I exclaimed in injured
astonishment. "There you go again?
Can't you get it into your head that
she didn't want you? Will you force
me to repeat that she thought you
were a ninny, a fool, a nincompoop?
Here, Romilda, come to my rescue:
you see, he's accusing me of false
friendship!... However, what does it
matter, after all? He's your
husband, so we'll have to let it go
at that. But it's not my fault...
just admit that! I'll go myself
tomorrow to pay a visit to that poor
man, left there in the graveyard all
by himself, without a flower and<
without a tear! Tell me, there's a
stone at least on his mound?"
"Yes!" Pomino hastened to reply.
"The town put one up.... Poor papa,
you remember..."
"Yes, I know... he delivered the
funeral oration, ... If that poor
man could have heard.... What's the
epitaph?..."
"I don't know. Lodoletta made it
up..."
"The Lark himself!" I sighed. "The
poet laureate of Toadville! Did you
ever...! Anyhow, we can drop that
subject too. Now, I should like to
know how you came to marry so
soon.... Not long didst thou weep
for me, merry widow mine! Probably
not at all, eh? But, for heaven's
sake, can't you say a word to me,
not one little word? Look, it's
getting late... as soon as morning
comes, I'll go away and it will be
as if we had never known each
other.... Let's not waste these few
hours.... Come, answer me!"...
Romilda shrugged her shoulders,
glanced at Pomino and smiled
nervously. Lowering her eyes and
staring at her hands, she then said:
"What can I answer? Of course I was
sorry... I cried...!"
"And you didn't deserve it!" the
widow Pescatore volunteered.
"Thanks, mother dear!" I replied.
"But not so very much, eh? Just a
little! Those pretty eyes of
yours--they don't see very well, to
be sure, when it comes to
identifying people--but still, a
shame to turn them red, eh?"
"We were left in a pretty fix,"
Romilda continued by way of
extenuation. "If it hadn't been for
him...!"
"It was nice of you, Mino!" I
agreed. "But that rat of a
Malagna... no help from him?"
"Not a cent!" the Pescatore woman
said, dryly. "He did everything...!"
And she pointed to Pomino.
"Or rather, or rather..." Mino
corrected.... "Poor papa... you
remember he was connected with the
Administration.... Well, he got
Romilda a bit of a pension in view
of the circumstances... and then,
later on..."
"Later on, he consented to the
wedding!"
"Oh, he never objected really! And
he wanted us all here, with him....
However, two months ago..."
And Mino launched out on a narrative
of his father's death, of the love
the old man had for Romilda and the
little girl, the tribute the whole
town paid him on his passing.
I interrupted with a question about
Aunt Scolastica, who had been such a
favorite with old Pomino. The
Pescatore woman, still mindful of
the pan of dough plastered on her
face by that terrible virago,
hitched uncomfortably on her chair.
Pomino explained that he had not
seen her for two years, but that she
was still alive, and so far as he
knew, well.
"But what has been happening to you
all this time?" he now asked. "Where
have you been? What have you been
doing?"
I told him all I could, avoiding
people, places and dates, to show
that I had not been idle those two
years. And so we whiled away the
hours far into the night, waiting
for the morning when I should
publicly declare my resurrection. We
were growing weary from lack of
sleep and the strenuous emotions we
had been experiencing, and it was a
trifle cold besides. To warm us up a
little, Romilda insisted on
preparing coffee for me with her own
hands. As she handed the cup to me,
my eyes met hers, and a faint
distant smile, touched with a
wistful sadness, flitted across her
lips:
"Without sugar, as usual, I
suppose?"
What was it she caught in my gaze?
At any rate she hastily looked the
other way. In the cold pale glow of
the early dawn, I felt a clutch of
unexpected homesickness gather at my
throat. I looked at Pomino bitterly.
But there the coffee was, steaming
hot before me. The fragrance of it
filled my nostrils. I took up the
cup and slowly began to sip the
delicious drink.
"May I leave my bag with you till I
know where I'm going to live?" I
asked Pomino finally. "I'll be back
after it before long!"
"Why, of course, of course!"
proffered Mino solicitously. "In
fact, don't bother to come and get
it. I'll have a man take it to you."
"It's not so heavy!" said I, with a
sly look at Romilda.
"And by the way," I asked, turning
to her, "have you any of my things
left, perchance?--shirts, socks,
underwear?"
"No," she answered sorrowfully, with
a gesture of helplessness. "I gave
them all away... You understand ..,
after such a tragedy..."
"Who could imagine you would ever
come back?" exclaimed Pomino.
But I would take my oath, that, at
the very moment, Pomino, skinflint
that he was, had one of my old
neckties on!
"Well, never mind!" I said, ready to
take my leave now. "Good bye, eh?
And good luck!"
I had my eyes on Romilda, but she
refused to meet my gaze. I noticed
only that her hand quivered as she
responded to my clasp: "Good bye!
Good bye!"
Once out in the street, I again felt
lost--solitary, homeless, without a
place to go or a purpose to
realize--though I was back in my own
native village, the haunts of my
boyhood.
I began to walk, however, looking
anxiously at the people I kept
meeting. How was that? Would not a
soul recognize me? And yet, I was
the very same person! The least
anyone might have remarked on
noticing me was my extraordinary
resemblance to the late Mattia
Pascal! "If he had one eye a little
out of true, you could take him for
Mattia outright!"
But nothing of the kind. No one
recognized me, because everybody had
forgotten about me, ceased thinking
of me at all! My presence aroused
not the slightest curiosity, let
alone surprise.
And I had been thinking of an
earthquake, more or less, a
sensation, a stoppage of traffic,
the moment I appeared on the
streets! In my great disappointment
I felt a humiliation, a bitterness,
a spite, that I could not now
express in words, but which I then
expressed by cutting, by refusing to
approach, people whom I, for my
part, recognized perfectly well--why
not, after a few months' absence
merely? Yes, I could now see what
dying meant. No one, not a living
soul, had a thought for me. I might
just as well never have existed at
all!...
Twice I walked the length of the
main street of Miragno without
attracting a glance from anybody.
Hurt to the quick, I thought for a
moment of going back to Pomino's and
informing him that I did not like
the bargain we had made. Why not
take out on his hide my irritation
at the insult my home town was
offering me! But Romilda would never
have followed me without constraint,
nor did I, for the moment, have a
place to take her. I ought to have a
house ready at least for the girl I
was eloping with! Next I decided to
go to the Town Hall and have my name
scratched off the registry of
deaths; but on the way there, I
changed my mind and headed for the
Boccamazza Library.
I found in the old place I once had
held my reverend friend, Don Eligio
Pellegrinotto, who did not recognize
me either, on the spot. To tell the
truth, Don Eligio claims that he did
know me from the very first, but
that he wanted to hear my name and
be absolutely sure before throwing
his arms around my neck in tearful
welcome. "You see," says Don Eligio,
"it couldn't possibly be you! Well,
you couldn't expect me to let myself
go with a man who merely looked like
you!"
Be that as it may, my first real
greeting came from him; and it was a
warm one, I can tell you. He
insisted on dragging me back to the
village by main force, to drive from
my mind the bad impression the<
coldness of my fellow-townsmen had
made upon me.
Having expressed myself so clearly
on this latter subject, it would now
be surely in bad taste to describe
what happened, first in Brisigo's
drug-store, and later at the Union
Cafe when Don Eligio, prouder than
he had ever been in his life,
presented me as one returning from
the dead.
The news swept the town like
wild-fire, and the whole population
turned out to have a look at me and
ply me with millions of questions.
"So it wasn't you they found in the
Flume at 'The Coops'? Well, who was
it then?"
I don't know how many times I was
asked to answer that fool question!
Yes, everybody, each in turn--as
though they could not believe their
eyes:
"So you're really you?"
"Who else?"
"Where'd you come from?"
"The other world!"
"What have you been doing?"
"Playing dead!"
I made up my mind not to budge from
those three answers, and I left them
all on pins with a curiosity that
lasted for days and days.
And no better luck fell to my friend
"the Lark" who came to interview me
for the _Compendium_. To make me
open up a little, he produced a copy
of his journal dated some two years
before--the number containing my
obituary. I told him I knew the
thing by heart and that the
_Compendium_ was widely read in the
other world.
"In Heaven?"
"Of course not! In the other place!
You'll see for yourself some day!"
Finally he mentioned my epitaph.
"Oh yes! And thanks ever so much!
I'll drop around to the cemetery
some afternoon and have a look at
it!"
I will not bother to transcribe his
feature of the next Sunday, which
started off with a headline in big
letters:
MATTIA PASCAL ALIVE
Among the few--besides my
creditors--who did not show up to
congratulate me was Batty Malagna.
Nevertheless, as I was told, he had
made a great fuss two years before
over my cruel suicide. I quite
believe it. He was as sorry then
over my tragic death as he was now
over my resurrection. I understand
why, in both cases!
I found a home with my Aunt
Scolastica, who insisted absolutely
that I come to live with her. My
queer adventure somehow had raised
me in her estimation. I have the
very room in which poor mother died,
and most of my day I spend either
there or here at the library with
Don Eligio.
He is still very far from completing
his inventory.
"With his help I have finished my
strange story in about six months.
He had reread every word, but will
keep the secret, as though I had
revealed it to him under the seal of
the Confessional. We have argued a
good deal about the significance of
my experiences; and I have often
said to him that I still can't see
what earthly good it is ever going
to do anybody to know about them.
"Well, there's this, for one thing,"
says he. "Your story shows that
outside the law of the land, and
apart from those little happenings,
painful or pleasant as they may be,
which make us each what we are,
life, my dear Pascal, life is
impossible."
Whereupon I point out to him that I
fail to see how that can be; for I
have not regularized my life whether
in relation to the law of the land
or in relation to my private
affairs. My wife is the wife of
Pomino, and I'm not quite sure who I
am myself!
In the cemetery at Miragno, on the
grave of the poor chap they found in
the Flume, the stone still stands
with Lodoletta's epitaph:
O'erwhelmed by Evil Fortune
Here lies of his own will
MATTIA PASCAL
Scholar Book-Lover Librarian A
Generous Heart--A Loyal Soul
May he rest in peace
Erected to his Memory by his
Sorrowing Fellow Townsmen.
I have placed on the grave the
wreath I said I would; and every now
and then I visit the cemetery for
the sensation of seeing myself dead
and buried there. People often
watch me from a distance, on such
occasions; and sometimes somebody
meets me at the gate and, in view of
my situation, asks me:
"But say, who are you really,
anyway?"
I shrug my shoulders, wink an eye,
and answer:
"Why, what can I say?... I guess I'm
the late Mattia Pascal!"
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